Who & What Are You Taking for Granted?
Cultivating an active habit of appreciation will change your life for the better. 100% Guaranteed.
Thursday, January 11th, 2024
It’s inevitable. Humans are biologically designed to identify what’s important (from people to resources), work to obtain it, and then head out, looking for more. It’s in the process of looking for more that we inevitably give less of our attention to what we’ve already obtained.
In other words, “we take what we already have for granted.”
Humans are also gifted with the ability to self-reflect. And learn. Thank goodness! Do you appreciate these abilities? I do!
When it comes to “taking people or things or conditions” for granted, there is a definite down side. Our capacity for joy is reduced. How is that a good thing?
“Hello, good sir! You could be more joyful, but that seriously reduces productivity and achievement. Let’s nip that in the bud, as the total waste of time that it is! Besides, you already have those people and things. Now, you need to focus on obtaining more.”
~ Your Subconscious Self
It sounds crazy, but we do it every day — all 8.1 billion of us. Is it impossible to change this? Yes, and no. The answer lies in our definition of instinct.
Animals are categorized separately from humans for a number of reasons, including faith-based beliefs in the dictates of Gods or God. The one difference we all seem to agree on (religious and secular thinkers) relates to self-awareness and the ability to make a conscious choice to not behave based upon instinct alone.
When kangaroos in Australia seek out a mate…they don’t consider how the future consequences of sex, pregnancy and joey-birth will impact their day to day life, nor do they consider the pros and cons of delaying parenting for a few more years. They may, or may not, truly think about it at all. Most of us believe they are responding to impulses, drives and instinctual desires that completely overwhelm their activities and thoughts for days, weeks or months (depending on the breeding season of the animal in question), and it’s quite possible they don’t comprehend the connection between a season of sex and the season of birthing babies that follows a few months later.
If you doubt me, volunteer to foster a 6 month old female kitten who has to be kept indoors for the next 6 weeks until her heat is over and she can be spayed. Not a lot of thinking (or sleeping) going on, as that cat literally crawls the walls of your home, yowling endlessly. Not a lot of self-reflection or careful decision-making going on.
The point is that we are similar. We have a reptile brain stem. We have instincts that make the difference between whether we live or die. We have impulses, drives, and instinctual desires that lead many people to say, “I don’t know what I was thinking, or why I was attracted to your father. I just couldn’t keep my hands off of him, and now, you exist.”
And, we are different. We can step back, observe, consider, evaluate, and choose to resist what the reptile brain wants us to do. We can choose better. Which brings us back to gratitude, appreciation, and NOT taking people, things, and circumstances for granted. And, like most deeply seated habits, it begins in childhood.
My Dad used to say to me, on a regular basis, with real and honest amazement, “All I have to do is turn this knob, and water comes out. Hot or warm or cold! Isn’t that amazing?”
Fifty-two years later, I still think this way. I am also acutely aware that I have a pantry filled with food, while billions aren’t sure where their next meal will come from. I can take baths, showers, or soak in a hot tub and swim in a pool, knowing the water is free of parasites. I have a 20-year old food forest and garden, which is flourishing and provides a great deal of healthy food to my family, and it’s not being blown to smithereens by bombs, because I’m not living in a war zone. My family is adequately healthy, our pets are healthy, and we have (1) access to local medical care, (2) that medical care is modern (not medieval), and (3) we have insurance, so we can afford it. The weather this year has offered definite benefits (regardless of whether it’s similar to or different from the past few decades). When the sun was shining today, I could feel it’s warmth and enjoy all the brilliant colors of our property, because I’m not blind, and because my Mom never missed an opportunity to relish and delight in the small and joyful moments of life. Like her, I will stop what I’m doing (many times a day) and say, “Oh my gosh, look at _______!” With a big, happy smile on my face.
I am tremendously grateful for my parents. They instilled in me a deep streak of gratitude and appreciation for the myriad “little things” in life. As a result, it’s much, much easier to be a happy person. If I were only happy when shopping, on vacation, paying for entertainment, or receiving a gift…then it would be rare and expensive for me to “be happy,” right?
It’s like being a “cheap drunk.” This term is usually meant as an insult, but it just means I pay less than the next guy, to get a buzz. How is that bad?
In the comment below, please consider sharing five (5) people, things, or conditions of your life that you often forget to appreciate. Then, write them on a piece of paper, tape it on a wall (where you’ll see it often), and commit to taking the read it and “feel” gratitude every day. Having a bad day? Do it twice! You’ll feel better, I guarantee it.
And, here are three more things I appreciate every single day:
I wouldn’t be so sure about these cats. They certainly think, consider, plan and implement their plans. You can tell it very easily. Their movements are extremely well preplanned and almost always faultless, regardless of the height. It’s not instinct. It is extremely complex assessment, calculation and ongoing reassessment mechanism - one, which we do not have. I wrote about it in detail here: https://thepathishere.substack.com/p/how-many-senses-do-you-have
Unlike human movements. Even when we have ABS, warning systems, dozens of safety systems, lights, safe tires, clear field of vision and other humans next to us who are equally attentive to the road, we repeatedly manage to wreck our cars. We shouldn’t be allowed to go out of our rooms, for our own safety.
I bet cats have developed thinking abilities which are far beyond ours. They just don’t brag about it.
As regards seeking out mates by cats… We only see those individuals who are active. These cats which chose to remain ascetic or celibate, we don’t see them, they don’t socialize, don’t wear special robes, don’t write morality books about their chosen way of life and they don’t appear on TV or in podcasts to discuss the superiority of feline celibacy and temperance over “go, go, that’s your instinct”.
A lovely and thoughtful article. Thank you.