On the Topic of Being Buzzed
Yes, I’m writing this after my fourth Mimosa (on an empty stomach)!
Monday, September 19th, 2022
Dear Freedom Friends,
Today, I’m going to share my thoughts on alcohol! How to best utilize it, what it does for us - depending on who we are - and so on.
For me, as I’m an innately happy and positive person, I’m feeling happy as can be! And, alcohol brings forward what is inherently within a person. So, here’s what I mean about being “inherently positive.” When I was in Edinburgh, I went looking for boots…I wanted this incredible mix of waterproof and robust with a fun city flare. I found the perfect boots. You’ll see them in this photo:
They don’t look special is this photo, I suppose, but they were this fun orange leather, with a Goretex waterproof layer, and I loved them. Comfortable, wide enough, cool yet rugged enough to withstand a long walk along forested trails — I’d promised myself that I would ditch my old sneakers and come home with awesome waterproof boots from the British Isles (where people get wet weather, right?) — and I’d found an awesome pair!
Then, on day ONE (and that’s after I threw my old sneakers in the trash and dashed off to catch the train to Inverness), a split developed along the outside edge of my left boot, expanding each day, so that I had to return them. It was a ridiculous situation, as I left Scotland (headed to Iceland) with nothing but the SANDALS I had bought in Bath, England!
But, I was smiling, happy, and laughing about it. Because, hey! Life is an adventure, right? And so, today, on a wet, cold, rainy day in Reykjavik, I headed off with one goal in mind = find proper, winterized, waterproof and amazing boots!
Half way through the search, I said to myself, “March, you can always spend three days in Iceland, wearing sandals, and figure it out at home.” You see, I am a minimalist. I actually sort of hate shopping. At home, I have exactly five pairs of shoes: slippers for the house, sandals that are dangerously old, winter boots that mostly house spiders, too-tight waterproof tennis shoes that hurt my toes, and well…two pairs of comfy, city-only shoes I bought while in Macedonia. Okay. I lied. Six pairs of shoes!
On this trip (as I really need to throw out the dangerously loose sandals) - I bought new sandals (as souvenirs from Bath, England), and my goal was to come home with boots (so I could throw out the spider home)…
So. The Shoe Hunt was on, and I was wet, watered, rained on, and dripping after 3 hours of wandering the cover-less streets of Iceland. Why not renege? Give up for now, let the Universe send me the “yeah, not now” message, and just live with what I have….wait until I get home. Right? But, well…something told me to keep going. After all, the very nice lady in the Hostel I’m staying at had recommended the place I was headed toward…Regate “something”…and I’d stopped in several shops so far, asking for additional directions (as I don’t have cellular in Iceland) and I thought, “March, just follow through. Yes, there may be nothing there. But, don’t give up prematurely.”
That, my dear friends, is the essence of perseverance. Right? So, onward I went — and as a result, I met a lovely couple of young women and had a chat about the terrifying inflation in Iceland. These women, growing into their adulthood now, as the world goes through the constriction of an un-acknowledged Global Depression combined with this century’s Eugenics Movement - wow. I feel for them, and it was interesting when they said they “order their shoes online.” Hmm.
I also met a brilliant man at a lovely bakery, who expressed plenty of pride in his baking skills, as he sold me a baguette of sourdough that is as light, fluffy and crispy a a typical “French Bread” loaf at home! I also met a super tall, sweet young man at a bar that prominently features dart-throwing … what? Areas? Lanes? Arenas? My god, people… I have no lingo for the world of darts, so please share below! Suffice to say, darts makes SO MUCH sense in a cold part of the world where people pretty much have to spend 1/2 the year indoors!
I also met a LOVELY LOVELY LOVELY young man in a GORGEOUS specialty meat butchery store that was about two blocks away from the ultimate goal…and he was so sweet, fun to talk to, and OMG - I will be frying up a delicious piece of beef with garlic/paprika marinade and a perfectly baked, salted potato (OMG - am I looking forward to dinner - yes!).
So, dinner supplies in hand, I kept on walking, past one wharf after another, following the googled directions of kind person after another, until I finally found…Regata. The store recommended by the lovely lady at the reception desk of my youth hostel.
Remember I mentioned perseverance? I walked into this store, wet, a bit tired and I saw eight pairs of shoes. Count them. Eight. Eight! So much for selection, right? But, I looked at them and lo and behold - oh my goodness - there was a simple, elegant, pair of boots that had a FLEXIBLE sole! So many shoes have hard soles, that are truly unhealthy for a human foot, and indeed - all of the shoes at this store had typically hard, rigid soles except for one.
ONE PAIR. I asked the man, “do you have size 9 USA?” He checked all the boxes. “No.” I frowned, looking down at the shoe in my hand, the actual display shoe on top of all the boxes. “This looks so right,” I said. “Try it on,” he said. “Maybe it’s right for you, because sizing can be weird, and these are men’s shoes, so who knows?”
THEY ARE FUCKING PERFECT.
Because I’d showed up wearing sandals with thin summer socks, he gave me a pair of thicker socks to try on — to make sure they’ll fit with proper winter socks. Yes! So, I said, “Can I buy a pair of these socks, please?” He had none of those particular socks, so he says, “Just take the socks.” LOL! Yes, those pink socks are perfect and probably equivalent to $20 freebies!
So, what on Earth does this have to do with alcohol? On second thought, not much, but I told myself I’d keep everything I wrote in this essay, so there you go! Okay, in truth, what I’m trying to say is that ATTITUDE MATTERS. I could have bitched and moaned about the Edinburgh shoes that died…but I didn’t. I laughed about it! I told the story with humor and smiles to at least a dozen people.
I also could have whined and given up on my boot search…but I didn’t. I could have thrown a pity party as I came home, Icelandic rain having destroyed my paper bags, the baguette slightly damp despite being tucked into my coat, clothing sloppy wet and cold…but no. I gratefully threw my wet clothing into the 4th floor dryer and am sitting in the 1st floor huge public room, typing away at my keyboard in my shorts and Icelandic Sweater (bought at a used clothing store a month ago) happy as a clam in high tide!
And, not merely because I just finished off a PITCHER of mimosa! I was happy before I popped the cork on my bottle of Duty Free Champagne, filled the PITCHER with orange juice, bubbly and a raw pressed ginger/apple shot — and that, my dear friends, is the point of alcohol, IMO.
It doesn’t dictate how you’ll feel. YOU do. Alcohol simply relaxes the frontal lobe controls, allowing our true, inner feelings to express themselves, and enhances our life, by shedding light on how what’s really happening inside of us! What we feel is up to us…not the distilled grains, aged grape juice or hardened cider.
So, the fact that I feel happy is not the “effect” of alcohol, it’s the “effect” of me, enhanced and released by the alcohol, so I feel it in a stronger way.
In a similar way, I have a super close friend who I met over the internet. Yes, believe it or not, after being introduced to PUBG by my teenaged sons and their friends, I developed an affinity for the game and the fun of playing with random strangers from around the world.
PUBG (to catch people up, who may be thinking, “wait, March, what are you talking about?”) is the nickname for a game called Player Unknown Battle Ground (I think, lol) and it’s a first person shooter game. Since my kids discovered computer games (via our home computer which was purchased to augment our homeschooling activities - little did I know, lol), I’ve been playing whatever they play. You can NOT understand your child’s obsession, interest or experience playing computer games if you don’t play them yourself…so, I began with Plants VS Zombies, then it was Minecraft, then it was League of Legends, then it was PUBG (when my eldest was 17 and I finally caved and allowed “first person shooter” games). That’s a funny story, but I’ll save it for another day.
So, eventually, I began to play PUBG on my own, and I had the BEST time meeting up with younger groups of kids. Basically, if you play 4-person teams, and you’re playing alone, you’ll end up being a “random” put into a team with 3-person teams of teen guys playing together on Discord. Initially, they would say things that should not really be said in the presence of a “Mom,” but once they realized I was a Mom, they’d suddenly hush up, apologize!, and then they’d start asking questions, about me being a Mom who usually played with her kids. “Wait, you play PUBG with your kids? OMG - I wish MY Mom played PUBG!” Etc.
In the midst of playing this fun game with my kids, and other random people, one day, I stumbled upon a group of guys who were in their 40’s. And, we had so much fun that we friended each other on Discord. And now, I count one of them as a very close, personal friend. So…back to the alcohol theme…I’m wondering why on Earth I brought this up? LOL! Excuse me while I scroll up a bit.
Yes, there we go. Alcohol releases inhibitions. If we think about this, what a gift it is! Human society tends to shut down people, on an emotional level, because emotions (all emotions) are inherently volatile, dangerous, even violent. But, in a healthy society, where we have spaces and traditions that allow for the release of these feelings, they are phenomenally powerful. Consider the way in which women of the Middle East are able to express/release/move through their feelings of grief? If you look at the “stoic” way in which the British Royal Family is behaving around the death of The Queen, it’s clear that not all cultures allow space for “expressed grief.”
And. I live in American. Emotions are very shut down, which was a problem when my Dad died. I was broken in so many ways. My son was with me (17 at the time) and he was brilliantly supportive as I cracked, cried and considered the rest of my life without my amazing Dad there, a mere phone call away.
About a month after my Dad’s suicide (which I fully support), I came home and absolutely could not express my feelings around my husband or my Mom; it was a shut down environment. So, to my surprise, after a life of drinking maybe 3 times a year (Mimosas for Mother’s Day, Christmas Morning and New Year’s Day)…I saw some fun little bottles of Christmas Booze (for stocking stuffers) and thought, “I know nothing about hard alcohol. I’m in my 40’s. Maybe I should learn?”
The next 2-3 months, I discovered the power of the Gin & Tonic to release pent up grief. My friends, on PUBG were so sweet to listen to me, as I’d toss back a G&T or two and (while racing around a gaming map, collecting tools and sharing resources with my team in pursuit of a Winner! Winner! Chicken Dinner!) I’d break into sobs, as I reminisced about how amazing my Dad had been.
In this way, alcohol helped me process emotions and grief and feelings that NEEDED to be felt, released, shared, expressed and moved through. So, I believe that alcohol can be very helpful in the grieving process. And probably other “emotional release” situations.
Which brings me to my final point, today. The best way to USE alcohol is with intention. Meaning, know what you’re doing, plan your use of this drug and don’t waste money.
I raised my kids on the idea that “IF” you’re going to drink, you don’t want to poison your body more than is necessary and you don’t want to brag about how much you drank. The point is to get a buzz, experience an emotional release and enjoy yourself…not to blow a ton of money on six over-priced drinks!
When I drink, I do it on purpose. Usually this means drinking on an empty stomach. Why not? The point is to get the alcohol into your blood, so you can experience the effect, right? Unless you actually like the taste - like wine drinkers. Fine. Savor your aged grape juice as you please - but if the goal is to get buzzed, then show up at the restaurant with an empty stomach, order your drink and drink it BEFORE the bread and butter arrives. This way, you get to enjoy the buzz without having to buy another drink, you then eat, sober up and drive home safe.
Which brings me to today. I came home, a triumphant boot seeker, and at 3pm (with only a bell pepper and some nibbling on a baguette that I bought for dinner in my belly) I poured barely 1/3 of a bottle of Champagne into a small pitcher, with orange juice and that awesome raw ginger shot, and I’m now sitting here typing away, totally buzzed, a smile on my face, and HAPPINESS running through me!
In an hour or so, I’ll fry up that delicious piece of marinated beef, with olive oil and onion slices, toss in some chunks of that incredible salted potato and slice up cucumber and carrots to go with it…but first, I’m getting my buzz on!
And so, here you go. Me. As a person. An emotional human. Sharing with you the thoughts that run through my Mimosa-added brain! Smile. I’m happy. How are you feeling today?
Until next time,
March, from Iceland, signing off!